In today's 2-part interview, our very good friend, comedian and podcaster Pete Dominick talks poignantly about big life changes and finding his way after losing his dream job. We recorded that conversation last Fall and he graciously agreed to chat with us again this April to talk further now that the world is going through some big "life" changes and we're all trying to find our way.
We hope you will find comfort, common ground, and definitely a chuckle or two with Pete. So stick around for parts 1 and 2 of today's episode.
Mentioned In The Episode
Children & Nature Network - A global movement that grew from Richard Louv’s book Last Child In The Woods. They are working to increase equitable access to nature so that children - and natural places - can thrive. They do this by investing in leadership and communities through sharing evidence-based resources, scaling innovative solutions and driving policy change.
The Joe Rogan Show - Pete was a guest on The Joe Rogan Experience in November 2019.
Losing My Job Saved My Marriage - Pete’s post written for Wake-Up Call with Katie Couric.
Pleasant Peasant - Steve Nygren opened the Pleasant Peasant in the ‘70s in Atlanta, which grew into dozens of restaurants throughout the Southeast.
Stand Up! Garden Club - Pete’s gardening Facebook group.
Stand UP! With Pete Dominick - What started as a daily live radio show is now Pete’s daily podcast.
Vernon Stouffer - Founder of the Stouffer’s Corporation and Steve’s boss before he left to open the Pleasant Peasant.
Walk With Walsh - Jennifer Walsh leads mindful walks through Central Park. She teamed up with Mother Dirt to do a series of walks through Serenbe’s preserved nature trails, and Pete was one of her guests.
In today's 2-part interview, our very good friend, comedian and podcaster Pete Dominick talks poignantly about big life changes and finding his way after losing his dream job. We recorded that conversation last Fall and he graciously agreed to chat with us again this April to talk further now that the world is going through some big "life" changes and we're all trying to find our way.
We hope you will find comfort, common ground, and definitely a chuckle or two with Pete. So stick around for parts 1 and 2 of today's episode.
Mentioned In The Episode
Children & Nature Network - A global movement that grew from Richard Louv’s book Last Child In The Woods. They are working to increase equitable access to nature so that children - and natural places - can thrive. They do this by investing in leadership and communities through sharing evidence-based resources, scaling innovative solutions and driving policy change.
The Joe Rogan Show - Pete was a guest on The Joe Rogan Experience in November 2019.
Losing My Job Saved My Marriage - Pete’s post written for Wake-Up Call with Katie Couric.
Pleasant Peasant - Steve Nygren opened the Pleasant Peasant in the ‘70s in Atlanta, which grew into dozens of restaurants throughout the Southeast.
Stand Up! Garden Club - Pete’s gardening Facebook group.
Stand UP! With Pete Dominick - What started as a daily live radio show is now Pete’s daily podcast.
Vernon Stouffer - Founder of the Stouffer’s Corporation and Steve’s boss before he left to open the Pleasant Peasant.
Walk With Walsh - Jennifer Walsh leads mindful walks through Central Park. She teamed up with Mother Dirt to do a series of walks through Serenbe’s preserved nature trails, and Pete was one of her guests.
Monica Olsen (1s):
Hey guys, it's Monica here. I wanted to tell you about a new podcast that I've started with my very good friend, Jennifer Walsh called biophilic solutions. Our last season of Serenbe stories, building a biophilic movement was so popular that we decided to dedicate an entire podcast to it every other week. Jennifer and I will sit down with leaders in the growing field of biophilia. We'll talk about local and global solutions to help nurture their living social and economic systems that we all need to sustain future generations more often than not. Nature has the answers. You can find biophilic solutions on apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts, subscribe and follow us today. So you don't miss an episode.
Monica Olsen (41s):
All right, now let's get back to Serenbe. Stories. Serenbe is a place where people live, work, learn, and play in celebration of life speedy. And we're here to share the stories that connect residents and guests to each other, and to nature. This is Serenbe stories.
Monica Olsen (1m 11s):
<inaudible> today's interview our very good friend, comedian and podcast for Pete Dominick talks poignantly about big life changes and finding his way after losing his dream job. We recorded this conversation last fall, and he graciously agreed to chat with us again, this April to talk further, now that the world is going through it's big life changes, and we're all trying to find our way. We hope you'll find comfort, common ground indefinitely, a chuckle or two with Pete, so stick around for parts one and two of today's episode.
Monica Olsen (1m 51s):
But first Serenbe stories is brought to you by The Inn at Serenbe. The Inn is nestled in the rolling countryside of bucolic Serenbe, where guests can walk on the 15 miles of trails through preserved forest land, the wildflower meadow, and the animal village. You can relax by the pool hot tub or in rocking chairs on the wraparound porch, play on the croquet lawn swings and in-ground trampolines connect with nature and each other all while staying in luxurious rooms on the, inn grounds or within the community of Serenbe book your stay today@serenbeinn.com. Welcome back to Serenbe stories. We're here today with Steve Nygren and again,
Steve Nygren:
Hey Monica
Monica Olsen:
And our very, very good friend, Pete Dominick
Pete Dominik:
Monica, and Steve it's like I'm back with my family.
Steve Nygren:
It's so good to see your smiling face and hear your voice on the streets of Serenbe again.
Pete Dominik:
It is so good to be here with both of you guys and with this whole community, I have so many amazing memories with my family here and I'm in transition mode in my life. And so being here is automatically inspiring and idea creating and relaxing because it just is the cure for stress.
Monica Olsen:
It is the cure for stress. Yeah. And for of you who don't know, Pete Dominick has been on Sirius XM for the past 12 years. You may know him from stand up with Pete Dominick. We know Steve from the children and nature network, which is Richard lubes, nonprofit foundation. And I think that's kind of where our story begins, right?
Pete Dominik (3m 14s):
Yeah. I got connected with the children and nature network and found out about their work. And I said, I really want to be involved. I don't know what I can do with, or for you. And they said, we have an idea. We have a conference coming up. How would you like to host it? Because of course I am a host, I moderate conversations. I host events and I would love to host an event for the type of, for an organization doing the type of work that I cared the most about, which is connecting children to nature and working on saving our environment. And so I went to Vancouver for the first time and I hosted the what few day long event. And that's where I met this white hair. beautiful man, Steve Nygren who came up to me and his bow tie, I think.
Pete Dominik (3m 58s):
Right. And sadly, and, and introduce himself. And he told me about this place and I didn't quite buy it another way he described it. And I was like, there's a place like that. And he has a great pitch, of course. And so then I went back to my hotel room that night and then saw him again. He talked to me about it again. You really should bring your whole family down. And I said, okay, all right, sir, thank you. I'm really excited to, to, to hear more about it. I went home left, Vancouver, went back home to New York and I was sitting in my office studio at home. And I was like, let me just look this guy up and look this Serenbe place up. And I went to the website and I said, oh my goodness, this is really an amazing, original inspiring looking place.
Pete Dominik (4m 46s):
And then Steve told me that my kids would love it. I said, I don't, I don't know if my kids would love it. I, I don't, I'm not, I'm not sure. I looked a little bit deeper in the website. And I said, you know what? I bet they would. And then he invited me down to be an artist in residence where we stayed here for the week. I broadcast my show. And at the end of the week, I did a stand-up comedy show. Whole bunch of my listeners came out and it was a transformative experience for me, my wife and our girls. And they were here for an hour before they fell in love with it. They were here for an hour where they were jumping on trampolines and picking food off plants. And that was it. We were in fully in.
Monica Olsen:
Yeah. I've forgotten that you did the show the first year and you did made some good jokes about Serenbe.
Monica Olsen (5m 28s):
I think that our residents appreciated that. And then the second year, what did we do? Did we do a dinner with you?
Pete Dominik:
We did a dinner. We did. Yeah, I did my show from here. We did. We made some videos and yeah, I, I toured the farm, I think, which is really, really great. I learned a lot there because yeah,
Monica Olsen:
you did a great with our previous farmer, Matt, you did a funny, funny video that we'll put up.
Pete Dominik:
Yup. Tried to steal a tractor. Did not get very far and a chicken. I think maybe I did still a chicken and I was chased down by a rooster and it was, it was great. It was awesome. That was, yeah. So I've been here. This is my third time, but I had been here twice with my family. So this is the first time I'm here without my wife and daughters.
Pete Dominik (6m 10s):
And so it's different. It's hard because I had so many happy memories with them here that it seems wrong or weird to be here without them.
Monica Olsen;
You have a really good reason for being here right now. A couple of really good reasons.
Monica Olsen:
Do you wanna tell us about Richard luve?
Pete Dominik:
If you need to be told about him, I'm kind of happy to unwrap that present for you. And in a way, because I remember when I first discovered his work and his book last child in the woods, which was really a transformative read for me. I read it while I was away with my wife and daughters in Sicily where my wife's family is. And it was also a transition in my life at that time with work.
Pete Dominik (6m 54s):
And I was reading this book knowing I was going to be interviewing rich, but I'd never talked to him. I'm just, you know, one of the great privileges with, with working in media is you get to read a book or watch a documentary and then interview the author or the film director. And so I was reading the book, knowing I'd be interviewing him and not knowing how much it was going to transform me as a person, especially as a parent. And so that was a years ago now, maybe seven years ago where I first read last out in the woods, I interviewed him and that began a relationship where I kind of pursued him to, for friendship. I applied for friendship for mentorship. And then of course led me to Steve and led me to children and nature.
Pete Dominik (7m 36s):
And now came down here just to be with, with Steve and rich for his newest book. And he's done it again. He's written another amazing, inspiring book about our connection with animals. And I'm, I'm, I hope that everybody will get it. And I'm really excited to be in his presence and Steve's, and just be, you know, there's people, I've always tried to surround myself with people who are better and smarter than me. I think everybody should do that. And who I've always tried to surround myself with mentors, people who can teach me who I can suck all of their essence, dry and use what works for me and leave what else is behind.
Pete Dominik (8m 17s):
And that's what it's like being with Steve Nygren and being with rich Luve and Monica, being with you. I mean, you are a, a force. You are a person who connects people in a way like very few people I've ever met because it's a delicate dance and you dance it so perfectly. And you've put, you put people in, in, in connection with each other that that can build and feed and work with each other. In a way I could, I don't know that I could ever do that. I don't know that I could pick people and put them together in that way. And that's part of what you do. And it's part of what this community does because it also is a really great connection for people and Steve at the time, I always forget that.
Pete Dominik (8m 60s):
I think so much about nature, but so much of what you did here was to put people in touch with people where I live and my community in the suburbs of New York. We don't talk, we don't talk with each other. We don't wave. We don't say hello. You come down here to Serenbe, you're walking down the sidewalk and somebody waves and you like, Hey, easy. Okay. I don't know. Why are you waving to me? Like, do I know that guy? Geez, I feel bad. I didn't didn't I did know that guy. Does he know me? But it's, it's it's you don't have to know each other. It's just human beings connecting, connecting. Why do that? You do that? You do that over the air. Sure. Right. We do that on the streets. Right. Well said. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no.
Monica Olsen (9m 39s):
And actually, as I was thinking about this, so, so you want to talk just briefly about sort of, you're talking about transition that you're in right now, you've left Sirius XM about 30 days ago. And so that is where I found you. I had listened, I had my minivan and I drove it back and forth wherever I was going. And I was, I still am sort of a political junkie and sort of came in through whatever the channel was on and found you and put a channel, which I think was like president United States politics,
Pete Dominik:
Politics of the United States for the people of the United States catchy acronym.
Monica Olsen: So I loved it. I absolutely loved it. I fell in love with you. I felt that you were unpacking, unlocking things, explaining things, bringing people on that were really interesting.
Monica Olsen (10m 23s):
I was learning. It gave me a sense of maybe control to have a better understanding of certain things that were outside the typical media ecosystem or what atmosphere. And so I would love to hear just a little bit about, I know you've left, but you were kicking off a podcast again,
Pete Dominik:
Sirius XM was awesome to me. And it was a 12 year experience. Live radio does so much to bring a community of people together. And this is a community of listeners who are from all walks of life, affluent middle-class lower income. And they did all kinds of different jobs. And, and, and this radio show connected them.
Pete Dominik(11m 5s):
That's live radio and podcasting can do. And it was a group of people who are curious, who are passionate, who wanted to fight apathy, who wanted to learn. And for me, hosting that show was like going to college every day and cramming for a final learning about the issues, preparing for the interviews, talking to these people. And every day was like a classroom where I was just the host. I was never the teacher. I mean, I always impart my own opinion on things, but I'm no expert in anything. And I always thought, well, if you're going to host a radio, if you're gonna have a platform like this, you should be responsible with it. And you should bring on people who actually know what they're talking about. And so many people don't do that, especially men. They want to be the, the, the note all behind the mic and I'm the right one and you're wrong.
Pete Dominik (11m 48s):
And my brain is on loan from God. The great one and all that BS, nobody is it doesn't matter who you are to listen to one person for hours. You're not gonna learn much. You're only, it's only going to become some kind of a cult. And so I would bring on a, a wide array of guests and we would talk about everything from parenting to politics, to economics, to human connections, you name it. We discussed important issues that mattered to people in their lives, in their community, in their country and on our planet and leaving serious, greater the challenge in terms of what I was going to do next with an audio medium. And obviously this is the time of podcasting.
Pete Dominik (12m 30s):
And so I am, I've created a podcast. That's in many ways, similar, it's different because it's a different medium. It's not live, you're not taking callers. And so on. Although that I may transition back into that somehow. And it's, it's called stand up with Pete Dominick, the podcast. And it's the same thing. I get to interview inspiring thought provoking people and ask them questions about important issues. And obviously we have no shortage of those in this time that we're in. And we're in a very, and you touched on this Monica when you were talking about the old show, but we're in a very confusing time and the confusion can create anxiety and feelings of being overwhelmed by everything that's happening and it's happening seemingly so quickly. And so I'm trying to slow that down and explain to people what is happening and what you need to understand what the solutions to these problems are.
Pete Dominik (13m 18s):
And maybe how you can be a part of it. But if you're not going to be a part of it, at least understand it and not allow it to consume your life because we have enough whether our own families and our own careers than to deal with the president, you know, announcing that we're going to buy Greenland,
Monica Olsen:
right.
Pete Dominik:
Which by the way, it would be a really great purchase. A really interesting purchase, Serenbe, Greenland,
Monica Olsen:
just wait.
Steve Nygren:
And if that were the only announcement that concerned us.
Monica Olsen:
right
Pete Dominik:
then that would be just fine.
Monica Olsen:
Exactly. One of the things that I did is I went in and I follow you on Twitter. And I'm one of the things that I was seeing that you posted yesterday, which was really interesting. And that I just want to like touch on, because I think it sort of speaks to everything that we've been talking about over the past couple of days.
Monica Olsen (14m 2s):
It says you posted, does it seem like everything is overwhelming? Or is it just me hashtag Thursdays, Thursday thoughts. Yeah. And you've got so much engagement and stone. Oh yeah. More. I mean, I was looking at all your other tweets and comparison, no one cared and this one got tons of engagement. And then I started reading the, which you should go and do, but you might start crying. People are seeking connection, they are seeking an answer and they are feeling the same way. And you know, one of the things that is kind of a fun thing that they'll say is like one guy says, or women earn, I don't know. Oh, wow. Well, yeah, I know, right.
Monica Olsen (14m 42s):
I'm not having you on in the morning. Really sucks. Right. And so you got a lot of that, but you also got a lot of like, I'm tired of feeling on edge. I'm tired, the anxiety, I'm tired of feeling overwhelmed. And you know, we, so many things are going well, but so much in the media is sort of pushing us back down into your voice and trying to divide us one.
Pete Dominik:
I'm looking at it now. And there is one response, and I know this guy personally really well, and he happens to be a psychologist Dr. Herb Harman responded to that tweet, which again was, does it seem like everything is overwhelming or is it just me and what he writes in his response?
Pete Dominik: (15m 25s):
And I think this kind of encompasses what you're saying. And basically what a lot of people maybe it may have resonated with is the machines are taking over too much information. Our brains aren't meant for this. So there's too much, I think what he's saying. And there's, I don't know where the dad is on it, but there's too much information there's too much coming at you digitally on that screen. And so if you had a fight with your spouse or your kid is struggling in school, or you've got financial issues or your parents, my dad just had a heart attack. These are all real life actual things that you're struggling with. Then you go to your screen and you light up Twitter or any kind of news thing.
Pete Dominik (16m 7s):
And you see a flood of, of, of things that are happening. And the problem is this has always been life. I mean, imagine on December 7th, 1941, if, if you had seen the attack on Pearl Harbor playing out on Twitter, and then you had everything else going on in your own life, and then you learned, by the way, all of the other things that were happening in the world right now, you're seeing revolution people in the streets all over any rock in Chile. And of course in Hong Kong and you you're connected to that. And, and, and then you see the president tweeting things every day, and then you see all kinds of other things, a natural disaster, the wildfires you're dealing with, you know, climate change, all of those things on top of your own family's issues, it's too much.
Pete Dominik (16m 58s):
And so people need, I'm realizing this kind of unintentionally that when I lost my gig at Sirius XM, it meant I didn't have to have this constant drip of news in my veins. And instantly I was less stressed. And so while I've tried to fight apathy for years, maybe we need to think less about the day to day ongoings of impeachment or of any other news story that's unfolding and more about the longer-term issues in the world, or, and pick a few or the, the shorter term issues in, in your life disconnect, take time each day, be in nature that these machines are taking over and they're taking over our children as well.
Pete Dominik (17m 43s):
And they're creating stress and anxiety in our kids that we did not have. And we don't know how to parent, because we didn't, we don't relate to it, to, to disconnect from these machines. And you have to get back to the way that human beings are supposed to be. I think I know a evolutionary biologist, I suppose it would be the field of study, but we are supposed to be connected with other species and with our ecosystem, not with machines, I don't think that's a radical thing to say. That being said, we are connected to machines that's life, but ration itl, there are trade offs. Take the news out of your vein.
Monica Olsen:
Yeah.
Steve Nygren:
Yeah. I think the big difference, I think is look at what you have effect on. I call it my own backyard, whatever it is, where you can affect change.
Steve Nygren (18m 26s):
Why did we spend the time worrying about those things we could do nothing about. And, and so it can be passing information of it's going to affect your life, but why do we focus on something that's happening somewhere?
Pete Dominik:
It's, it's absolutely an integral piece of advice. Steve, and it's, you know, doing that show for 12 years, I talked about the most divisive thing. We talked about guns and racism and religion and things that people are really divided over and sexism and gender and all of those things. And after the 12 years, I think the thing, the effect that I had the most in terms of the thing that I talked about, maybe preached a bit was to abandon single use plastic. We talked about racism.
Pete Dominik(19m 7s):
We talked about sexism. Those things resonated, those things matter to people, but it's the one thing that I think most people took away was, you know, one of the things I don't use, you know, I don't buy plastic bottles of water and bags anymore. And by the way, it doesn't mean we have to be pure, you know, but we be limiting our relationship with single use plastic was something that I was very focused on and continue to be focused on. And it's for me, one of those things, as you say, where can you create change? And I was just on the biggest podcast in America and he had bottles of water, Joe Rogan's podcast. And he had these bottles of water everywhere. And I realized everybody I've been advocating against this. Now, here I am.
Pete Dominik(19m 47s):
I forgot my thermos. And I won't do that again because here I am on, on TV, on YouTube holding a plastic bottle of water, which is, you know, like Rudy Giuliani holding a crucifix. They don't go together like a vampire with garlic, me and the plastic bottle. And so, by the way, do you know, Rudy Giuliani can't go out in sunlight. His skin begins to burn. So he's a vampire. So he, if he wants to though, he just turns into a bat and flies out the window. The point is I'm sitting there being SAC religious, doing something that I, here I am with this plastic bottle of water. But what I did was instead of I being a hypocrite, I said, Joe, on the biggest show in the world, why don't you just get a big water dispenser and have a mug that's sponsored as your name on it.
Pete Dominik (20m 33s):
And if you don't want to make money off of it, then use the money and, and, and, and help fight plastic. You have the Serenbe mugs here. And, and so he said, Hey, why don't we not a bad idea? And if that's the thing that I did on that show, despite any of the other issues, and we talked about everything then, great, and now he's got all these people watching, and they're more aware of it because you can't get mad at people for not being aware of a thing, but you can fight that ignorance and apathy and make that point. And so maybe that's what I picked. Maybe that's the issue I picked single use plastic and trying to end its existence in our lives.
Steve Nygren:
Well, and all the other issues. I mean, when you, when you have an audience like you do on air, you can touch one person.
Steve Nygren:(21m 14s):
That's for sure. Maybe that one person you don't even know about that step forward and decided that's going to change my life rich changed years, for sure.
Pete Dominik: So many people have had that effect on my life, but they, those people had that effect on other people's lives because people are listening to our conversation. And when the show ended, it was devastating for people. I'm still getting hearing from people even a month later. And they talk to me, people I've met. I never heard of, I thought I heard knew everybody that was listening. They'd contact me at one point on social media or they'd emailed me. And all of a sudden, I'm hearing from a lot of mostly men saying you changed the man I am in terms of the father and husband, I am, by the way that you talked about your own shortcomings and how you were getting better.
Pete Dominik (21m 55s):
But I had role models, frankly, Barack Obama was the president while I was raising my daughters. And he was raising his daughters. I watched the way that he raised his daughters and I watched the way that he treated his wife. And then Steve, you with your daughters, like I watch men and how they are with their daughters. And I try to take that on the air. And so many men reached out to me and said, I became a better husband while you became a better husband. I became a better father while you became a better father and to have that effect on one person, as you said, that's all anybody could ever, you know, my cup is filled, but hundreds or thousands of men reaching out and saying that, I mean, every day I cry, when I read those emails every day I cry and I say, I hope you'll come to the standup Dominic podcast.
Pete Dominik (22m 39s):
But if you don't fine, because we, we created something we grew together. Yeah.
Monica Olsen:
I think the biggest thing that I'm seeing in, in conversation we're having, and we're having people on the podcast and just even living here is trying to find that common ground. And so whether that is, we can all agree on, we shouldn't have single use plastics, or we should all agree that nature is a good thing, and we should either get out in it or protect it. Yeah. Finding those things like that aren't as divisive and finding the people that we don't agree with on maybe these very polarizing topics that we can all agree that we want to protect the trees or the fish,
Pete Dominik:
the problem in, in, in America and with humanity, and probably always has been, is tribalism.
Pete Dominik (23m 25s):
And you're on that team and I'm on this team and I have to win. I have to beat you. And, oh, by the way, the worst amongst of take joy, watching someone lose, and I'm not interested in that anymore. And so I like to talk about how my wife and I disagree on so many things and that we can't even agree right now on a TV show to watch together. And sometimes we can't agree on what to, you know, to have for dinner. Cause that's real. Cause that's two people, any two people anywhere and so fine. You put that aside, you find out where you do agree and you work on those and you spend the time on those issues with no matter who it is, you it's your parents, it's your wife, it's your coworkers.
Pete Dominik (24m 5s):
Where can we find unity and, and, and work on compromising. And we've gotten to a point where our media has us so divided to get ratings by the way, but it's about to sell advertising to make money. Cause it works that we have lost this idea that we are all in this human experience together. We're on this journey together. Let's find ways to compromise. And Steve always like, I've never seen him get really too upset about something that somebody believes. And I've, I want to be more like you, I want to be less reactionary and more understanding of people who I disagree with.
Pete Dominik (24m 49s):
And I'm working on that. It's hard. It's hard for me because I get easily offended and outraged by injustice and bullies. And I want to, I want to solve all of it and save the world, but it's increments and it's little pieces and it's not really helpful when I react negatively and get upset and worked up and start yelling. So the other day, when I cut a guy off in traffic and he came over and started yelling at me, I blew him a kiss. And then we went out and had dinner and we've been talking, you know, shoutout to rusty.
Steve Nygren: I always think that it takes a lot of sandpaper for a good finish.
Steve Nygren (25m 32s):
And so when I see those difficult people come forward a little diagram right there. Hey, you know, that's, that's, that's a softening my edges maybe a little bit. And I just can understand where they're coming from. The, the, the other thing is, and I had a friend who was a young, young psychologist, Brew Joy, and, and he was always good at saying, you have to look at both sides. Everyone wants to only look at the happy side, the good side, what's going to make us all. And he says, it's a balanced world. Or we would tip over the side. I have a way to go ahead. You were well. And so he said, you know, when you're just appalled by someone, maybe it's a rapist.
Steve Nygren (26m 13s):
Maybe it's someone who was doing awful things. He said, possibly think that there's roles that have to be taken. And instead of being so angry at that person, maybe have gratitude that they have filled that space so that you didn't have to.
Pete Dominik:
Very interesting way of looking at it. I mean, I have, you know, I, I interviewed a murderer once convicted murder and he taught me so much. But the main thing he taught me was how he came to murdering another person. You don't, you're born as a rapist or a murderer. These are things that are learned. And, and so my way to approach often that that type of person is how did that part, what was that person's journey? How did they arrive there?
Pete Dominik (26m 54s):
How did I arrive? Where, where I arrived and, and really trying to understand that as opposed to just judge the conclusion of where they, they ended up and, you know, I don't know that everybody can find redemption, but given the right opportunity and resources, most of us can. And so I'm not going to judge you on your worst behavior or choice. And I think too often, we really do do that. We do, but
Steve Nygren:
because we don't look at each other's eyes or in each other's souls,
Pete Dominik:
Well, I could look into your eyes for the rest of my life. Steve Nygren, they're so deep. And we don't, and it's hard to do that. And it's intimidating to do that, I suppose.
Pete Dominik (27m 35s):
But, you know, you said earlier, you know, we all, we all want to have this put on this brave face, that things are going well. And that's what social media is Instagram and Facebook, especially where you put up a picture of your family on vacation, which I'm known to do shirtless. And cause I'm really am in great shape at 43 and people should know, and I need the likes and the approval and all of that. But that's yet you at your best here I am on vacation, which you get, you know, maybe once, if you're really lucky once, if you're really, really lucky more than that a year, maybe your life is a vacation who knows, but, but Instagram, I always say Instagram and Facebook, isn't who you are. If you really want to know who someone is, check their internet history.
Pete Dominik(28m 18s):
That's who somebody is. They're looking up, all their hypochondriac concerns. That's where their gossip is. That's where their real person is. But I wanted to ask you, Steve Nygren and you too Monica for this to put you on the spot, you both have been huge influences on my life as human beings. You both connected me to both experiences and community and mainly other people. And you've also done that for my family, which I will get emotional, but forever be in your debt. And I hope that the idea is to just pay that forward. But who is it in your life, a person in your life that did that for you, Steve, who is someone that introduced you to an experience and other people, or, you know, provided you with some piece of wisdom that you took and rode away with?
Steve Nygren (29m 12s):
Well, there are certainly people through every phase of life. Sure. Yeah. I remember as a graduating senior from high school and I was headed to the University of Colorado and we, you know, we have been farm families for generations on the Plains of Colorado and that can trap contractual. And my uncle who was a professional sax player could have had a huge opportunity in, in, in the big bands of, of the forties. And he didn't, and he looked at me and he said, don't let this trap you get out of here.
Steve Nygren (29m 54s):
And knowing the disappointment that both my grandmother, who could have been a, had an opportunity to go to the metropolitan opera and always regretted it. And I knew his regrets and they were both there in their lives that they were very happy, children, everything. And so that, from that I, I, I left. And so that, that was a huge advice.
Pete Domiik:
If we had time, you can probably fill a book with each phase of your life where people yeah.
Steve Nygren:
And then he goes on and, you know, Vernon Stouffer is his, is he was determined what to do with Stover's fruit corporation and selling it. Oh, that's still there, French bread pizza.
Steve Nygren (30m 36s):
I ended up in the home office. It stokers, I worked for Stover's and Mr. Stofer and I were the first in the office there in Cleveland, Ohio, and the home office. And, and they're just, you know, down the hall. And, you know, he sort of took me under the wing and just shared stories with me. And also I think he, he saw, I was this person that he could, he could sort of think aloud about what was going on and saying, oh, you guys did, was sit there and trash the Swanson's, how do we beat the swans? And so, you know, those are all, and then through each phase of life, there's been, you know, really important people.
Pete Dominik(31m 16s):
And now through this whole journey with, you know, know, what's interesting is for me what you've been as much as you've introduced me to this community, you and I, and I don't know if you recall this, but I've, I've approached you a number of times and asked you about fathering to daughters. And you've given me a number of times, pieces of Sage wisdom. That seems so simple, but I've met all of your daughters and, and they're such wonderful beings and they're, you know, more than anything to me, they're all very confident and they have a scent. They have a confidence that I'm frankly not used to and slightly intimidated by it. And almost surprised because I think because of sexism in general and, and in my own, and, and, and societies, and these women are, so I want to say, well, adjusted, but confidence is what I get from them.
Pete Dominik (32m 5s):
And I sit there and go, well, how do I instill that in my daughters? How much of that was, was your parenting, your guidance, putting them in the right places. So to me, that's something that I've really, wasn't expecting to get from you, but . Happy to have stolen.
Steve Nygren:
That's great.
Pete Dominik:
I didn't get to you Monica. Now I've turned the, I turned the tables on the interview. I'm sorry, but you can't say Steve. Cause of course we know Steve has had a huge influence on who was the person maybe that had an influence or change the trajectory of your life. If that's not too dramatic.
Monica Olsen:
I don't, I, my really the first one person I think of is my husband and I, that may seem like good cliche or something, but, but Jeff has, so we've been together for almost 20 years now.
Monica Olsen (32m 50s):
And so he has always pushed me and I think he pushes me to uncomfortable places and he himself. So I'm an extrovert if you hadn't noticed. And he is not, he would much rather be at home and hang out. And so he, and he's such an intellectual, he's so smart and bright and curious. And so he is so far out on ideas and trends. And so he'll push me one, whatever that is going to, you know, he's doing and that'll make me uncomfortable, but he makes me a better person by pushing me to sort of rethink choices that I'm making. And one particular not story, but he was an economics major.
Monica Olsen (33m 34s):
So he taught me one time when I had a job offer, they had given me, it was like, you know, Silicon valley technology job. Right. And I, they gave me stock and they gave me money. And I wanted, I don't know, more of both. Let's just say, but he's like, well, you need to think about, put it on an indifference curve. And I was like, well, it's an indifference curve. He's like, oh, he's like, let me tell you about that. And indifference curve is basically you have money and you have stock options or you have access to nature. You have access to big box stores. What's more important to you. Do you want to live right next door to target? Or do you want to live right next door to nature? Right. But then you're 10 miles from target. And so somewhere on that curve, it's sort of like an X, Y right. Somewhere on that curve, you'll find where, where you want.
Monica Olsen (34m 15s):
And so anything that you're trying to make a decision on, think about it as an indifference curve.
Pete Dominik:
I like that. And to summarize it, I would use, I love this phrase. You can't let the perfect be the enemy of the good, so you can't have all of everything you want on the indifference curve. And you have to realize that life is trade-offs. Whether it be with, I mean, so many, I would imagine relationships break up because you, you, you just can't deal with this quality of this person. And you think that you're going to be with the person who's going to have all the things you want. And definitely not that quality. No, that's not necessarily true. The grass isn't always greener over here or job or career, which is not to say, don't go outside your, your, your comfort zone and, and beyond that indifference curve, but don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good, whether it be a candidate for office, you know, a job, a spouse, a place to live, whatever it is.
Pete Dominik (35m 6s):
It's just that the perfection, I mean, maybe you would disagree or put it differently. To me, that's, that's a fool's errand to pursue. I mean, obviously that this body is perfect, that I'm in, but I mean, you know, and other things,
Steve Nygren:
it's probably one of our biggest problems with our political system. We're constantly searching for the perfect candidate. We're destroying. Some of them are this and this and this.
Pete Dominik:
She's got this and that and that, but you know what? She doesn't feel the same way as I do about, about this. Well, nobody does. Neither does your spouse, neither do your kids. Neither does anybody that know, agree with you on everything?
Monica Olsen:
Well, that's a good way to sort of start to leave it, but I did want to ask you one last question. Is there anything else you want to share?
Pete Domiik (35m 45s):
Anything else I want to share? Just how much the being in this community, since it is your podcast, your story has really changed me and how pursuing living in a community like this is something that is an aspiration of mine, and that people should get to know this community. Not that they have to move to Serenbe, and live in Serenbe, but to try to, I hope replicate the idea that you have here now that every community has to be like this community, but that this is a very interesting idea that can bring people a lot of peace and joy and calmness in their lives, as it has the people that live here and other parts of this country and the rest of the world.
Pete Dominik (36m 27s):
So I would just say to people listening, you know, if they don't know about this community, look it up. And if they do continue to spread the word because it's working and I am so happy to be a part of your family and this community, and to evangelize about it and proselytize about it, because I did everybody, I tell about it, discovers it, and whether it's the place for them, or just a piece of it is a place that they can take somewhere else. It's a great, great resource in an amazing place that you have created and that you have all cultivated. And so I congratulate you and I thank you. And it's a real, real highlight of my life to know you guys and to be here. And when I'm here, I'm very, very happy.
Monica Olsen (37m 9s):
I just wish my wife keepers were here with me and I look forward to when they are,
Steve Nygren:
Even though you don't live here yet, you're definitely a part of the fiber of it feels that way. It feels that way.
Pete Dominik:
For sure. Thank you. Thanks guys. Thank you guys.
Monica Olsen:
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Monica Olsen (37m 51s):
And Nygren placemaking.com. That's N Y G R E N P L A C E N A K I N G.com. So Pete, you're back, you're back and see if we're recording this remotely. So, but we're excited to see both of you guys, Steve and Pete, and I wanted to follow up basically from last fall and our conversation that hopefully everybody just listened to, you know, P you were about 30 days out from Sirius at the time, and you would spend a couple of days here with us and things have changed.
Monica Olsen (38m 32s):
It is now early, April 20, 20, we're in the midst of shelter in place in COVID, but you've also been recording your podcasts for what are we at six months. Now? How many months have you been doing that?
Pete Dominik:
Yeah, that sounds about right. Five months. I haven't, that's a good question. Whatever the beginning of November was when I started just about the same time I was last at Serenbe serious exam ended my contract in the beginning of October. And so, yeah, and it's been crazy. The craziest most amazing, most challenging five months of my entire life for a lot of different reasons, both personal and professional.
Pete Dominik(39m 13s):
My dad's health, my daughter's health, and it's not serious life threatening, but scoliosis with a, each has to wear a back brace now. And then of course the pandemic and losing all of my gigs that I'd worked so hard and clawed my way out of my wife had lost all of her clients and classes, but somehow, somehow we have figured things out and we are, I'm not going to say thriving cause we're, we're terrified about our financial future, but there's something about, well, there's something very specific about this pandemic, which is the phrase one day at a time has never meant so much. And every day that you wake up, you and your close loved ones, don't have a dry cough and a fever is an amazing day.
Pete Dominik (40m 1s):
And that way of thinking is the way that I hope to continue thinking after this is hopefully all over.
Monica Olsen:
No, I think that's a great point. I think one of the things that you had mentioned, and I do want to hear more about sort of the podcast, but I thought I was struck by listening to our conversation from last fall is that you were saying, you know, on your street, nobody really talked to each other. Has anything changed in your neighborhood? Are you out and about more? Are people out and about more you live in what? A suburb of New York.
Pete Dominik:
Yeah, just north of New York city, Rockland county. Clarkstown to be specific Congress to be even more specific and I'll get out my home address as well, just to come over.
Pete Dominik (40m 42s):
No, you can't come over because what gore detained. Yes. It's changed. This is clearly bores to people out doors. It's forced them outside. If they have a yard, they go outside. People are absolutely talking walks. I'm seeing people live on a dead end street. So it would make a lot of sense for people to walk up our way, because you know, they just keep they, they get stuck and wouldn't know what to do, but I'm seeing more people walk up our way that I've never seen. And sometimes they have a dog. Sometimes they don't one old lady walks a cat, which I find bizarre, but no, I'm kidding. There's no cat lady, but yeah, there are so many more people outside walking and unformed and the park was so busy.
Pete Dominik(41m 29s):
The park that I go in every day and run or walk in. And I'm usually only see few other people every day was so busy that they actually had to close it down. Cause we're at the peak as we peak right now of, of our outbreak here, where I live and that were just too many people out there and congregating. But yes, the answer to your question is I'm seeing a lot more people outside and it's, it's a really fascinating behavioral or, or societal observation to witness. And you're kind of like what took you so long?
Steve Nygren:
Have you met new people that are actually neighbors or talk to someone that you only saw?
Pete Dominik:
Yes. Yes. The people around the corner, it was a little bit awkward, but awesome.
Pete Dominik (42m 13s):
You know, it's like, it's awkward because you say, how did we never speak, but awesome. Because at least now we're connected. Yeah. I think that relationship will be after we're back to a more normal life. Well, I, I worry Steve, once we get talking politics, it'll be over again. But you know, you worry, you just, I never want to upset people with anything and my neighbor is about, but it seems like neighbors are so private because they don't want to have problems seemingly. And so I, they just don't connect is certainly specific to my neighborhood. It wasn't like that where I was growing up in many other places I've lived, but people just really keep to themselves here for, I don't know, some bizarre reasons.
Pete Dominik (42m 57s):
I certainly wish I was at Serenbe.
Steve Nygren:Remind us how your neighborhood is set up. As far as sidewalks, does anybody have a porch? Are they sitting out in their front yard now?
Pete Dominik:
Ha nobody sits in their front yard here, Steve that's for sure. Because they could be, see. So people do sit often, you know, in their bare backyard often and which are fenced in there aren't any sidewalks in my neighborhood. There are, and you know, a couple of blocks if you will, or neighborhoods over some of the newer developments, but people, people don't really connect and stop and, and, and speak the way, you know, a human being should, the way they do their at Serenbe they way they do it communities all over the country.
Pete Domink (43m 50s):
And it, the neighborhood certainly doesn't lend itself to that. And you know, this is where people are to drive the cars only. I mean, there's really not even good public transportation where I live, which is pretty bizarre. Cause it's so close to New York city.
Monica Olsen:
Do you find that the girls are your daughters or teenage daughters? Like, are they out walking? Are they like, how are they doing without the socializing with friends? And in-person
Pete Dominik:
doing surprisingly well, they stay up till I two in the morning and get up at 10 almost every night.
Monica Olsen: Yeah.
Pete Dominik:
We've thrown a lot of the rules out the window in terms of the screen time, but they are absolutely getting outside every day and exercising and we still have to push them sometimes too to be outside and to walk the dog.
Pete Dominik (44m 40s):
But not as much as we did before all of this because they want to be outside. And it's been a, a fairly mild spring here, very mild. And we've had some beautiful sunny day. So they have definitely spent a lot more time outside. We have a nice yard here where I live and like I said, they closed on the parks, so that's pretty depressing, but yeah, they're getting outside more and I think they're appreciated it more, you know, constantly forcing them to learn new things or at least try Ava helped me build a new fence for my new garden plot, which I've added because why not? And I taught her how to teach or how to use a, a miter saw know, circular saw that you pull down.
Pete Dominik (45m 23s):
Unfortunately her hair got caught in the saw cut off her thumb. We couldn't go to the ER because of coronavirus, but I'm, I'm kidding. She did fine. It was great learning.
Monica Olsen:
It says life experiences that will make her happy.
Steve Nygren: Now that they've closed down the parks where people walking or how has that changed?
Pete Dominik:
The, you know, Steve, that's a great question. It just happened yesterday. I, I only know that Val and I, my wife and I are taking to the streets. So we're doing our runs in streets. And I might even today I was thinking about driving into a neighborhood I've never been in and running around over there and wearing just tights, no shirt, because I don't know those people.
Pete Dominik(46m 7s):
And I thought it would be entertaining, maybe face paint, but I, I don't know. I it's it's time to explore. And I think that that's, so that's a funny question, Steve sad, because when you say, what are they doing now that they're not in the park because it's closed? Well, they're probably doing what they did before the pandemic forced them all out. And hopefully you want to, you want to think that people are having experiences right now, especially outdoors or connecting with other people on, on different virtual chats that will sustain you. You, you, you hope that whatever they learn, whatever they've read, whatever new person they've talked to, whatever hobby they might have picked up because they had more free time on their hands.
Pete Dominik (46m 49s):
Some people do. Some people don't obviously that that will sustain that they will continue that relationship continue that walk in the, in the woods or even just down the street. And I I'm an optimist. So I believe that most people will keep a lot of these things that I'm talking about through the end of this nightmare. But I, you know, the realist in me sometimes where it's, oh, we'll just fall back into normal pattern. So I, I hope most people will take these new things and run with them.
Steve Nygren:
Is the reason they closed the park, because there wasn't enough green space for social distancing.
Pete Dominik:
Yeah. The pathway is more than comfortable for people wanting to run past each other.
Pete Dominik (47m 33s):
But it's just narrow enough that there were starting to be groups of families with strollers. They would stop and they would talk. And in my community, I didn't know this, but apparently they had drones, little drones flying over the park, watching as people kind of clustered and talk, which, you know, I don't love for privacy reasons. But for public health reasons, I think is probably a good way of checking in. People don't know better people's behavior as to want to stop and to talk and to connect to people. And right now, at least till April 20th, you know, we're, we're taping this on the eighth. So it's going to be closed for a couple more weeks. So there are other parks with more space that they haven't closed yet. So I'm certain, we'll probably all head over to them and then fear that they might close them.
Pete Dominik (48m 14s):
But there are a lot bigger they're state parks nearby.
Monica Olsen:
So tell us about the podcast. When we talked to you in the fall, I think you were doing what three days a week, tell us a little bit, like what's changed. Who, what guests have you had on that are really interesting and like even how has that affected, you know, the past sort of four to five weeks during COVID how you've pivoted does that,
Pete Dominik:
Is that what you say during COVID? I don't know. Is that terrible? Oh, it's fine. Everybody has their thing. I say COVID drain shelter in place during this crisis. All of them are fine. I just wonder if we'll ever agree upon what I call it. Pandemic. What do you say, Steve?
Steve Nygren (48m 54s):
He's probably got something really wise. No, I just simply said the virus. Well, that's very, that's even that's darker than, yeah. It was a little distilled. This is the current virus I should put, because I think there are a lot of other ones in there. Not all about health and body.
Pete Dominik:
There it is. Yeah. For me, what has changed Monica is I've taken the podcast to daily, which is what I did on the radio. I did daily on the radio and it's a lot of work for sure, but I have more time to do it. Cause I don't have my other responsibilities traveling and taking care of the kids, driving them around. And number two, as we all know, everything is so focused on the COVID the virus, the pandemic, the shelter in place is a comedian.
Pete Dominik(49m 43s):
And as a, as a broadcaster and host of a national radio show, I've always tried to talk about things that people care about and then make things that they might not care about important to them. I've always tried to fight apathy, but both as a, as a host of a radio show, that's daily and live when it wasn't the radio. And now the podcast and a comedian it's, you're always looking for what people are going through. That's a shared experience. So yes, while I want to introduce them to issues that they're not familiar with and, and hopefully fight apathy and get them to care about these issues, even though they don't maybe directly affect their life. I do have to talk about and like to talk about the things that we're, we're all dealing with and the shared experiences that we're all having.
Pete Dominik (50m 26s):
And there has never a shared experience like this one never there's nothing remotely close. So my show is now every show is seen through the lens of life during this time. And the other thing I've done is I've begun to, you know, my show's always been a mix of talking to experts on any number of issues that we're discussing and talking with the people who are listening to the show, who also may, by the way, and are experts at something, whether they're a teacher, a scientist or a mechanic, they know something really well. And it's always great to you to experience. But what I've been doing is because I lost my job. So publicly, you know, I'm a broadcaster and everybody knew I lost my job.
Pete Dominik (51m 10s):
And I decided to document my anxiety and depression that went along with it and write about it and talk about it everywhere. From television to radio, the podcast to an article for Katie Kirk's newsletter, because of that. So many people reached out to me and said, I've been there so many people help me with their experiences. So many people just supported me. And now the craziest thing is millions of people are basically having happened to them. What happened to me, millions of people are now losing their jobs and with it, money, identity, ego, and they're dealing with anxiety. They might have never dealt with. They're dealing with depression that they might have never dealt with.
Pete Dominik(51m 51s):
And, oh my gosh, I just got done with a former course on it. I'm here to help. So I'm no expert, but I do. I have learned a lot from that experience right before a whole bunch of other people, many of them, which were like, you're going to be okay, one door closes and another opens. And all of a sudden AHH thelike door closed on me. And those people that were encouraging me are now in, in the boat that I was in. And so I'm doing my best while I continue to struggle to try to share these coping mechanisms, learn from people, continue to learn from people and really open myself up and the show up to anybody that wants to talk again, I'm not a psychologist, I'm not a shrink, but I can keep a conversation going.
Pete Dominik (52m 43s):
And right now that's something that people need a conversation that people need to know. And I needed to know that they're not alone. And literally a lot of people are physically more alone than they've ever been. There's a lot of, you know, single people, people living alone and that's really hard, but I'm just putting myself out there for them. I'm, I'm calling complete strangers on the phone every day. And if they let me tape it, I'll tape it and share it. But I I'm just talking to people all day. That's what I do. And I don't have all the answers. I don't have many answers, really. It just keep a conversation going. And that's what I'm doing every day in the podcast, talking to experts about all these issues and keeping a conversation going with thoughtful, hilarious, passionate, curious, generous kind people.
Monica Olsen (53m 30s):
Yeah. And you wrote him a blog for Katie Kirk's blog and
Pete Dominik:
it was more of an essay essay, but I feel like that was really pivotal at least.
Monica Olsen:
I mean, I've been talking to you for months about how you're feeling, but I felt like that was a really personal, you really put it out there and I feel like that was a pivotal moment for you. And that was just before COVID, you know, just, as it was kind of coming from the lexicon, did you find that that really sort of changed how people saw you or was that a turning point for you?
Pete Dominik(54m 11s):
Yeah, yeah, that was scary. So what I did was, and both you and Steve who I've gotten to know and trust completely knew about a lot of the most personal struggles. And I had shared this with you both. I think when you were visiting New York, if not prior to that, and the title of that post was losing my job, saved my marriage. And I wrote honestly and openly and explicitly about how my wife had really gotten to a place where she just wasn't happy with, with a lot of the ways I treated and talked to her in terms specifically of I had gotten this kind of arrogance about me, that I talked to all these, you know, big deal, intellectual people every day.
Pete Dominik (55m 8s):
And when I come home, I'm not sure you can join me in this kind of conversation and what it meant. Well, I kind of would, would condescend and I was always right about everything. And it was like, why even hear from you? I mean, I'm generalizing. It wasn't like that all the time. I wasn't a complete monster. We had a lot of happiness and so on, but it was like that far too much. And having that moment of condescension or, or arrogance or dismissal once a day is far too much for any relationship. And I think I was doing it fairly regularly and losing my job, humbled me in a way that nothing had and put me in this really dark place.
Pete Dominik(55m 51s):
It was a place that my wife had visited and lived in off and on throughout her life. And so being in that dark place with no light, not knowing what to do was the most difficult struggle of my life. And in walked Valerie with a lantern and she, sorry, I get emotional with that came right out nowhere . I mean, that was partly impressed with my usage of, of lantern. That's partly what really nice actually. Yeah, it was a CA a kerosene lantern.
Pete Dominik (56m 31s):
So she just lit the way for me, man. I, and, and, and I have to say, and I, I truly believe this. I, I love her now more than I ever did. I loved her for so many reasons. I fell in love with her, and then she reinvented herself to me by being able to help me in a way that I never needed. And a lot of people have been so amazing in my life, including all of you guys, but, but Val just held my hand and she picked me up and she wasn't mad at me for losing my job. She didn't blame me. And she just, she just peeled me off the ground day after day and gave me specific advice and coping mechanisms and framing and perspective and write in a gratefulness journal.
Pete Dominik (57m 16s):
And now, because I wrote in a gratefulness journal, I wrote some of these, you know, mundane little things that you'd never would be, think to be grateful for. Now, yesterday I was outside in my backyard and I spent about 12 minutes watching these red Fox three. I've never seen three in the woods play with each other and with a poor little mouse, tossing it up in the air and back. And it was the most entertaining thing. And the most in the moment I'd been in and probably 10 days it, and I thought about it. And then I talked about it with people all day, I kept bringing it up and I didn't realize how boring it was for them to hear about as entertaining as it was for me to experience.
Pete Dominik (57m 59s):
I saw three Fox today and the one was, and it's just people that, okay. Okay. Thank you. Now we're supposed to talk about economic policy. Yeah. The gratefulness journal was one thing that she gave me and that essay for Katie Kirks newsletter introduced a whole bunch of complete strangers to me and people. Yeah. It came out and complete strangers reached out to me and said, I need help. And I just again tell them, I can't specifically help you, but I I'll I'll talk to you. Let's talk just about anything, anything that you want. And I had a lot of new friends.
Monica Olsen:
Yeah, no. And I think we're all reassessing, what's important.
Monica Olsen (58m 39s):
And we're all, whether that is, you know, an individual in your life or how we spend our time. And yeah, I think we put up, we weeded like crazy, cause we don't have any events. I don't have any press coming in. So my weekends are like really mine again, which has been lovely. And I've weeded our whole side yard. I mean, it's been so therapeutic and like found like our bird feeders and put them up. And that has been, I've had my Fox moment with our birds. You know, I get excited and it's the little things that are fabulous. Right.
Pete Dominik:
They bought those things too, by the way, I spent like an hour yesterday, weeding and I put up two bird, bird feeders, but does bird feed go bad?
Monica Olsen (59m 21s):
Cause my birds are snaps, lives up to it and it flies up to it and just starts looking at it. I was like, nah, I'm good with my feed, Steve, we have two different kinds of feed one they won't do. And when they will, I don't know, vegan Cardinals, then I dunno,
Steve Nygren:
after nine 11, then there was some of this same reassessment, but it lasted what 48, 72 hours do you think, because this is much longer because everything you've mentioned, whether it is the relationship with Val or observing three foxes, those are all things generally that are in front of our faces every day. And we're just taking time to reevaluate, notice or appreciate how I think things are going to be six months from now.
Pete Dominik(1h 0m 7s):
It's such a great question. And I think the nine 11 analogy is as close as we have it. I was living in Manhattan and I was there that day. And so that timeframe that you mentioned, you know, 48, 72 hours is, is not too far off. I think people learn two things from that, helping each other and connecting with strangers and making eye contact with people, you know, was, was, was one thing just doing that a little bit more, but more importantly, I think people learned how precious life can be and how quickly it can end. And since nine 11, I certainly learned a lesson about that specifically. And I think about it every single day.
Pete Dominik(1h 0m 49s):
And whenever I dropped my daughters off, which has been like four weeks now that we've caught anywhere, but I, when they get out of the car, I say to them eyes and I want to make sure they make eye contact with me. And they usually they're rolling their eyes at this point. Cause they're 12 and 15. They've been having to do that since they were little to me. And, but that's because I'm 9/11, there were plenty of men and women who left their homes and didn't think that was the last time they were going to see their family. So I don't take that for granted. That's my 9/11. You know, that's what the shift created in me is, is understanding how precious life is. I think this is different in that the loss of life is, is, is different.
Pete Dominik (1h 1m 33s):
And in many ways, obviously it's not a terrorist group behind it. There's not that hate there. And so on except for the divisiveness of politics and the leaders that we have. But this is a long way of answering your question, Steve, I'm sorry. I don't, I guess, because I don't know. I don't know what this teaches us other than what I said earlier. Maybe some new hobbies and hopefully some new friends, because we're forced to connect or, you know, you're, you're maintaining relationships with people that you hadn't talked to in years, but I'm not sure that we're nicer to each other. Now. I'm not sure that we are, think life is more precious now because the, the kind of the loss of life is a different kind of thing.
Pete Dominik(1h 2m 15s):
But I hope if anything, I want to hope that people will live in the moment more because when I lost my job, people said, and my wife said this all the time. You're so worried about next week. You're so worried about next month, next year, you have no idea what's going to happen in the next moment or tomorrow. And like I said earlier, when you wake up in the morning and you don't have a dry cough and a fever, that's an amazing day. What are you going to do with that day? I hope that if anything, people learned a sense of mindfulness and appreciated liveness of the, of the fact that they have their health in this moment, they have their health in this moment.
Pete Dominik (1h 2m 55s):
And, and to stay in that moment.
Monica Olsen:
No, I think that's, it's perfect. And I, and I do think that because this is, this is going on so long and you know, we're not even, maybe even in the middle of it, we'll have more time to make those sort of adjustments or sort of change your head space of what's important. You know, I am hearing that from people and
Pete Dominik:
I'm sorry to interrupt, but it's very, it's hard to have you guys asking me questions because I ask questions and I'd rather hear your answer. So Steve, the question that you asked me, I'd love to hear what you and Monica think is the answer to your question.
Pete Dominik (1h 3m 38s):
As, as you're asking it, I'm just, I try, I was trying to fill space. I was like this, I wish he would answer it.
Steve Nygren:
You know, one thing that that, that I think about is, is what was the long-term really effects as you look at our government or reactions as well as individuals, you know, the things really happens. We focus to the point that we made sure that airplanes are no longer missiles of destruction, huge money, huge effort. If you look at the security, but we didn't look at of all of the other things that's for, you know, there are several, not several, there's a handful, of really crisis areas that we tend to ignore.
Steve Nygren (1h 4m 21s):
Just like we ignored this health. I imagine if we had thought more globally and put some sort of temperature sensors on all those airports screenings. So we could at least know if there was maybe someone entering with anything that's should have better health screenings. You know, I, I worry about our, our grid, which is very vulnerable. And imagine if that earthquake out and out west had been more severe and taken out part of the grid and what it would be like to be in times like this without the power grid in effect. And you know, what, if this were a foodborne virus and we've allowed 60% of our food to be grown outside the United States.
Steve Nygren (1h 5m 9s):
So who is going to start looking at the other really serious issues? Are we just going to take care this one? So we're better prepared. And then something's going to come out from left field and, and it's just a few, and we're, we're tending to ignore all of these threats. When I think we ignored. I mean the greater we ignored this one, right? Absolutely. You could, you could blame the Trump administration. And certainly there's a lot of blame to be laid there, but this didn't just happen over the last three years in our preparedness, we think we, we are beyond anything affecting us who, you know, a few months ago, who would have ever guessed, there was anything short of an invasion from outer space that would shut down the world.
Peter Dominik (1h 5m 59s):
I have a way of tying my point and your point together, which is as the individual, it's great to be mindful and live in the moment. Not that you don't want to plan for the future, you do, but as much as you can be in the moment, but a government shouldn't be living in the moment of government A government should be prepared for as many eventualities. You know, we can't be ridiculous. You guys are down south. We don't want Atlanta to spend money on snowplows. You know, because that wouldn't be efficient. You only have one ice storm every couple of years or something like that. But you do want them to be prepared for a pandemic. You do want governments to state, local and federal level to be prepared for all of the things that you just mentioned.
Pete Dominik (1h 6m 43s):
But I think that people don't look at that as money well spent or whatever they people live in, you know, by the, the, the financial quarter or the election. And that's no way to live.
Steve Nygren:
But also I think that that's looking at big brother taking care of us. Now you have a voice to where you can push him. Someone like me, we just have to stand by, but we can start growing our own food and not dependent on this system to do that. We can start putting a energy efficient houses and move to solar that we might be able to go off the grid or something happens. So, you know, I hope that individuals start waking up on how they're going to live if something bigger happens.
Pete Dominik (1h 7m 29s):
Yeah. And by the way, Steve don't sell yourself short. I know whose numbers you have in your cell phone. I think you can pay it. They don't take them anymore wrong.
Steve NygrenPeople are at the other end of those.
Pete Dominik:
Oh, Nygren is calling me again. What does he want?
Monica Olsen:
Well, Pete, tell me the last thing I started want to touch on is how do people follow you? I know that you have your podcast now that's everyday that everybody can find, you know, wherever fine podcasts are, you're available, but you're also doing special Patrion live conversations. Tell me about that.
Pete Dominik:
Yeah.
Pete Dominik (1h 8m 9s):
So, you know, how do you support yourself doing a podcast or in media and independent media? There's only two ways there's and subscriptions or both. I really don't want to have ads unless they're companies that I love, but I haven't looked for that. I've just looked for individual support demand. So people pay anywhere from $5 to, you know, a lot of people pay a hundred dollars. It's crazy a month. And what they get is a lot more access to me and the show they can contribute to the show. They can have their voice on the show. And I talked to them a lot and they get, everybody's a producer, somebody who has ideas of who should be on as well as what should be talked about.
Pete Dominik (1h 8m 50s):
And they themselves get to be the callers for the show. And so we're creating something that's 500 people in that community now, subscribers. And it's now that's enough people I think, to come up with an idea or set of ideas that we can all focus on and working on work on some of which are inspired by my work with you guys there. Of course. And so I don't know what that is, but we're crowdsourcing it. And it might be many things. I'm sure it's influenced by the COVID the pandemic, but, but it could be any number of things. So it's a really cool way to do media, independent media. It's not corporate and people know that they can get to me.
Pete Dominik (1h 9m 30s):
They can call me out. It's transparent. It's honest, it's passionate, hopefully entertaining and informative. And that's it stand up and be done the podcast.
Monica Olsen:
Perfect. And also we should follow you on Twitter. What's your Twitter handle at Pete Dominick on the Twitter and on the Instagram,
Pete Dominik:
I got to do the Instagram more. And now I got to do the tick tock. I I'm told I got to do the Tik TOK. I thought that was for kids. Nope. That tell me I got to do the Tik TOK. I got to do the LinkedIn. I got to do the bublé. Have you heard the bublé now? It's Michael bublé. I've got to do more with Michael bublé. I don't know. I've just made it up. Should be a social media that you also have, which you've kind of reignited is your standup garden club on Facebook.
Monica Olsen (1h 10m 15s):
Yeah. Yeah. That's fantastic. Facebook.
Pete Dominik:
And if you're not great, but if you are Franny insane reason, the groups are the good thing of Facebook because they're private. And if someone's a jerk, you know, getting like this is for people who are in the gardening, there's over 700 people, mostly in America that are just members of this garden group is stand up garden club, Facebook group search, Facebook groups or Stanhope garden club. And yeah, I didn't think because of my depression and because of my, I just needed to work all day every day that I was gonna be able to garden this year. But I decided that that was an important part of my life. And then now I have more time.
Pete Dominik (1h 10m 56s):
So I expanded the garden and so I repost it on Facebook. Hey, join the garden club. And re-invigorated it. And I just, basically, I have no idea what I'm doing. Am I gardening? Do I ask questions? And everybody else is asking questions. So whether you have, if you've had a one plant that died or you've got a whole farm, everybody's welcome to that Facebook club and it's fun and people are good and there's nothing political or divisive. It's just people sharing their ideas about their gardens. What works with us.
Monica Olsen:
I love it. Well, thank you so much for your time and for this follow-up. Thank you guys very much for having me. I could do this all day on the girls.
Steve Nygren:
Tell the girls hello, and look forward to the next time you can come to Serenbe.
Monica Olsen (1h 11m 43s):
Thank you for listening to Serenbe stories. New episodes are available on Mondays. Please rate and review the podcast and make sure to email your questions for Steve Nygren to stories@Serenbe.com. You may even get to hear them on the podcast. More details about episodes and guests are available on our website. Serenbestories.com .